The Power of Parents

With the last days and weeks of the academic year in sight, this time of year is often when parents feel it an opportune time to let school leaders know their thoughts on the teaching and running of the school their child attends. On the one hand, this can be an incredibly frustrating experience as, with the next academic year already soundly planned out, it is too late to make significant changes based on the information they provide. On the other hand it gives a valuable insight into how parents view the school as a whole and what they are saying about it when speaking with others. 

Handling Unwelcome Comments from Parents

Bearing in mind that a child’s school is the most consistent experience a parent will have outside of their own work, it can often lead people to think that they know more about the running and structure of the establishment then they actually do. This can lead to assumptions being made about staffing, policies and teaching and learning goals, as well as helping rumours to become established. 

The difficulties in handling these comments can come from the fact that parents never have the full picture of the management level of running the school, nor is it appropriate for them to do so. 

When to Listen 

The golden rule is listen to everything that is presented to you. Don’t interrupt, let the parent(s) talk themselves out. If you need to clarify a point they have made or word they have used, repeat it back to them in a neutral tone. Don’t offer your thoughts until they have finished speaking. 

When to Act

Often parents will offer their opinions because they want their voice to be heard. For some, getting it off their chest in an uninterrupted stream will be enough. Others will be seeking reassurance that you will be acting on their sentiments. Doing so will depend entirely on the information they are giving. Usually, if it is a non-personal matter, you will already be aware of it and have a plan in place, this can be an opportune time to share the structure of the plan with them and encourage them to let other parents in the community know that you are proactively working on it. If it is new information that you will need time to think over and work on, explain that and offer a time when you can next meet/speak to the parent about the matter.

When to Ignore

Unless nominated to speak for a group, parents should only speak for themselves. Often people will say ‘the parents’ in the hope of strengthening their claim. Explaining that you can only act upon what the person in front of you is saying, encourages the parent to evaluate how important the point they are trying to make is and whether it is worth pursuing or is just a minor grievance that they want to get off their chest. In these cases, following up with an email thanking them for their time and recapping the contents of the conversation is often enough to end the matter on a positive note. 

When your Hands are Tied

People have personal lives which are not for public consumption… unless they are a celebrity or a teacher. Seeing teaching staff every day can lead parents to feel that they know them better than they actually do. Therefore, when a member of staff encounters a personal issue that takes them away from school, often the rumour mill will go into overdrive. This is a difficult experience for all involved; the member of staff wants space to attend to their issue, the management want to respect that and cannot break confidentiality, the parent(s) want to know exactly what it is the member of staff is experiencing and why they are not in school. There is no easy answer to dealing with this situation but standing by school policies, explaining the plan to cover the member of staff’s absence and assuring the parents that all actions are to maintain consistency for the children should help to diffuse the situation. 

Making it a Productive Experience

After the long summer holidays, the children returning to school is a positive experience for most families and any feedback at this stage tends to be positive. With the Autumn Term being the longest, parents get a good feeling of school life and the routines of the school day. All schools welcome feedback, particularly at a time where parents are not answering it retrospectively and it is not too late in the school year to implement changes. Many schools plan two terms ahead, with the Spring Term being the time to start looking ahead to the following Autumn. Therefore, conducting a parent survey during the second half of the Autumn Term should give honest and accurate information, saving the frustration of hearing it all on the last days of the Summer Term.